Intentionally Losing Hope

As of late, I have prided myself with my never-ending wellspring of hope.  I go about my day with my financial troubles, my job that could LITERALLY disappear tomorrow, my potential health crises, my crazy parents....and what do I do...I hope.  I hope that I'll have enough money, I hope that this job will stick around and if it doesn't that another will fall into it's place, I hope that my health stays good, I hope that my parent's stay...less...crazy.  I hope so hard that it transcends that and becomes the fiber of my reality.  When things are bad...I hold onto that tightly woven parachute and land softly.  But I have to learn that sometimes...hope isn't enough.  That the gravity of situations will pull you down faster than the air can cushion.  Sometimes...you have to let go of hope and land where you will.  I keep hoping that you will come around...but I have to stop.  I have to push it past the dark recesses of my mind and out through the cobwebs and into the light.  The situation is clear as it stands now.  Hope won't change that.  So here I am...standing on the ledge...ready to jump...do I bring my chute..or hope for a water landing?