Epiphany

So this morning I woke up and realized something. I can do anything. I know how that sounds...but when I look back over my life...anything I have truly wanted to do..and tried to do...I have done. The things that I have failed at were things that I had no desire to do or things that were totally out of my hands. I can act, I can sing, I can dance well enough to get by, I can cook, I can fix things.... Shaggy is a great example. I hadn't prepared...I had never tried to do a Shaggy voice..but 5 minutes after they gave me the side I went in with it mostly memorized and did it well enough for them to consider me for the role. Culinary School is going very well...I am pulling an A in most every class. Relationships are harder...and different cause they are two way. I think that is why I get so angry when someone questions my ability to do something. For example a role I want to play. When someone who I am close to tells me that they don't think I can do it I get upset. Because I KNOW I can. I have faith in my ability. I can make my life work. That is where I am right now. That is my mind set. And if you think I can't do it...then I think I can convince you that I can...the question is...do I have a desire to waste my time trying?

WOW...just....WOW

So I am finished today's project today about 5 minutes BEFORE he started explaining how to do it. I HATE THIS CLASS...4 more days...just 4 more days. This guy is an interesting individual....
Anyway....my first solo Spidey party was yesterday. It went pretty well...the kids loved me. They were asking what superheroes I hang out with. It was pretty cool. On top of all of that...it was in the park I grew up playing in..Park Pals. Brought back some memories. I went to the reading for Tom's new play..that was cool.

TONIGHT IS HEROES NIGHT!!!! YAY! Sarah will be there! Maybe just Sarah..the rest of the crew is a little iffy. Billy and Tracy are busy as usual...they might make it..they might not. Adrian has company so he is going to try but there are no promises. So it may just be me, Sarah, and Hiro Sandwiches. GOOD TIMES!

Things are rocky on the homefront as usual. I think we have reverted to 12 year olds. Name calling...the whole 9. So now I'm bored and sitting in class...I want to go home...but I will just wait. I guess I could work on my project...but...that would be...working..and I'm not to keen on that. Anyway...lately I just feel like I need to leave and find a new life...start fresh. Things are just a little cloudy. I don't feel like I have much support...I mean I do..from some..but those that I at one time thought were my solid support system are now a lot more like a 100 year old rope suspension bridge..over a chasm. So I am thinking when I graduate I am moving...I don't know where...but atleast I know when. Well...I'll blog more later.

Hurt, Angry, Dissapointed

Things I never doubted would be said eventually have now been said...and some of the people who know me best believed them. What does that say about my relationships with those I think I'm closest to? I'm sick, I'm hurt, I'm angry. It's not because I wouldn't say them...I'm sure I would..but not while sitting in a theater. That's not who I am. It just hurts that it was said...and no one who knew me stood up and said "You must have misheard...Eric wouldn't say that." But I guess you never know someone till it's time for them to have your back. If this blog has ramifications...I guess I'll take them as they come, this is how I feel right now...so later. I'll blog later.

Computer Class

So I'm sitting in computer class now....bored. Just finished my project for the day...outlining the first couple chapters of the book of the class that we just finished using powerpoint. I keep thinking more and more that I REALLY should have taken that test to try to test outta this. SO EASY! Anyway...really not supposed to be blogging now so I'm gonna go. Blog later.

Hoop Jumpin, Penguin Divin, And Liver Killin

So the last few days have been pretty interesting. I went to Sea World on Wednesday with Dustin, Johnathan, Kimmy, and Dani. That was a blast. The free beer was flowin so we started drinking at 12:02. Went penquin diving..illustrated below. It basically cosists of diving on your belly and then sliding into the nearest hole in the "ice". Funtimes. Then we went to the mall so the girls could get a new outfit, then to Dustin's while Noah was gathering all the animals and the flood happened outside. Then off to Chillers were the wall o' alcoholic slushies were only a doller....dear god. Drank, got in a little fight with Nathan, got drivin home by another Nathan. Not great times.

Then I went to Disney yesterday and jumped through all the medical hoops that disney wanted me to so that I don't lose my id. Then off to see Lu Lu in Finding Nemo: The Musical. Which was amazing. The cast is soooo talented. Just an all around great show with my very beautiful friend playing many characters. I was beaming most of the show and then continued after when we met up for the walk out with her friend Josh, who I've just met and think I will attempt to keep in touch with.

Now today I have my first ever official Spidey party. It could be fun, it could be a disaster...only time will tell. About three hours from now I will either be having a blast or groping around 11 scared children trying to find the birthday boy through a mask I can't really see through. I'm hoping for the first one. So yeah. That's the update. I'll blog later.

I'm done

I am done dating. I am done liking people. When I feel the urge to find myself attracted to someone for more than a few hours I am going to supress that. I will be single...I will be who I am. Single works...you don't have to deal with the bullshit. I will be SINGLE. I am an attractive guy. Granted...right now I am a drunk guy...but still...attractive. I will not be treated like shit...and left in bars...and for God's sake I won't cry in straight bars. Anyway...I'm done. Today was good until around 10 p.m. then it started to suck. Blog later.